Karen

Thank you for posting my Poem, may I post more, here is another one, it
took me many years to be Strong enough to post what I wrote about my
experience, and now that I'm brave id love to share my Poetry with other women who been
through or who are going through any type of abuse, its time to heal and it
takes time to be strong..... You may keep my E-mail address posted on my
poems, if anyone would like to email me, id be happy to hear from them....

A True Nightmare

He Still Terrorizes Me In My Dreams
I Can Still Feel His Cold Hands Around My Neck
Still Hearing My Mother's Screams
A True Nightmare I Will Never Forget

I Can Still See Him Reaching Out
It All Happened So Fast
I Saw The Devil In His Eye's- I Could Not Move, I could Not Shout
Will This Be The End Of My Life

I Looked Down at Him- As He Held Me Up
I Knew He Wanted Me To Die
As I Tried To Focus My Vision
There were My Daughters With Fear In Their Eye's

Everything Turned So Blurry- Silent Screams
I Still Can't Move
I Cannot Breathe
Dear God Will You Save Me

I Must Of Blacked Out then
I Felt My Body Hit The Floor
Gasping For My Breath
Oh God He is Coming Back For More

Tears Falling From my Eye's
Where Will My Children be if He Takes away My Life
I Have To Stand Up
And Fight For What's Mine

I See My Mother Struggling With Him
He's Blocking her From Helping Me
I Still Don't Have A Clear Vision
As I'm Standing Over My Own Body

Am I Dead Or am I Alive
I Feel Myself Shaking Me
Katt You Have To Get Up
You Must Be Strong, Find Your Strength

I Couldn't Tell You What Happened Next-
For I Was In A Daze
They Told Me I Fought Couldn't Believe I Was That Strong
I Just Thank God I'm Still Here Today

Soon There Will Be A Brighter Day

Flashbacks of his violent temper
still linger in my mind
Some say I must forgive myself
Then I will be strong ~ I will heal in time
Why did I let him take Control
I let him take the best of me
I was afraid to speak my Mind
trapped in a Nightmare ~ In fear of the beast
My children stood in their own pain
seeing and hearing all this abuse
Am I a bad mother, I tried to protect them
What I thought was love, was a game of his sick use
Black and Blues ~ Bruised on the inside
Will the scars ever fade away
In search of my smile, Tears have all dried
Soon there will be a brighter day..

(C) 1999 Karen Approbato

Mommy's Now Strong

Mommy's Now Strong
Written December 1999
A Thread Hanging from My Skirt
My Hair Dull And Brittle
Not A Smile On My Face
Make-Up Running Down My Cheek
From All These Tears I Cry
Not One True Friend In This World
Bruises And Scars He Left On Me
Remains Deep Inside My Soul
A Pain So Real
My Mother Speaks Word's Of Love
My Daughters They Speak What's True
They Are Given Me The Strength To Move On
He No Longer Controls My Heart
My Daughters Are In Need Of Me
Mommy's Now Strong